Country music has too many bros, and Miranda Lambert is the only one stopping them.

As happy as I am for Miranda Lambert, I am disappointed at the lack of female artists in country music at last night's CMAs. Miranda was, really, the ONLY viable female candidate. Most of the categories were all dudes. 

Miranda Lambert was virtually the only viable female candidate on Wednesday (USA Today)

Entertainer of the year was Miranda and four guys.

Album of the year was Miranda and four guys.

New artist of the year was Brandy Clark and four guys.

Single of the year was Miranda, three guys and Tim McGraw "featuring" Faith Hill even if she was barely on the song.

Duo of the year was four all-male duos and one male-female duo.

The female vocalist of the year category was bleak. Carrie, Martina, Taylor, Kacey and Miranda...with Taylor out, who will they pick next year to fill out the category??

The male vocalist of the year could have been filled by any number of dudes in expensive jeans with wallet chains, calling girls "baby" and sticking synthesizers in their tunes. Male country artists are a dime a dozen, and people eat their formulaic drabble up with a spoon.

Like these idiots (USA Today)

Some of the other categories are better with female representation in musical groups (LBT, Lady A, Band Perry). Kacey Musgraves also did well, but she was the only other real contender as a woman. It's just disappointing to know how few women are making noise in the industry.

Kacey Musgraves won song of the year for "Follow Your Arrow," which is a HUGE deal considering the song's pro-LGBT message (USA Today)

Best songs of 2013

"Q.U.E.E.N.," Janelle Monae feat. Erykah Badu

Monae continues to show her proclivity for futuristic android metaphors and funky empowerment anthems on the lead single from "The Electric Lady." In an interview with Fuse, she described the song title as an acronym. "Q" is for the queer community, "U" for the untouchables, "E" for both emigrants and the excommunicated, and "N" for those labeled as negroid (which is, as I understand, an anthropological term for those of African descent).

The duo combine for a fantastic look into  society as they call for their fellow electric ladies (and gentlemen, presumably) to fight sexism, racism, stereotyping, homophobia, classism, political greed and so much more. Janelle gives some of her best weird as fuck facial expressions and even breaks into some spoken word/rap at the end of the song that should get your booty right off the couch and onto Change.org to try and make a difference.

"I'm Out," Ciara feat. Nicki Minaj

This blast of sass features one of Nicki's finest verses this year (and she has done plenty of them). The song would be perfect for dancing in the club after a shitty breakup--and that's what Ciara sets out to do. She taunts her ex for trying to get back with her, while Nicki takes a more direct approach of threatening his new girl. The theme is overdone, but the delivery is spot-on and delivers the perfect amount of sneering sexuality.

"Alien," Britney Spears

This song slowly propels you into Brit's eight studio album "Britney Jean" with ethereal instrumentation and a smooth vocal line. Our Princess of Pop reflects on how alone she has felt during more than 15 years of being a recording artist--but an unnamed "you," possibly fans or a loved one, are there to support her and remind her she is not alone. The alien metaphor could have been overdone, but it's just enough here to get the point across.

The album overall is the first album in 10 years where Britney is listed as a writer on every song in the list. For me, as an admitted fan, this makes me feel a hell of a lot closer to the message since I know it's from her own mind. I can only imagine how ostracizing it must feel for someone who has been in the spotlight since she's been a kid. And perhaps she feels like a creature from another planet sometimes when she realizes how much her life is directed by medication, guardians, schedules, paparazzi, etc. It would be enough to make me want to leave the planet for a while.

"Follow Your Arrow," Kacey Musgraves

Kacey first impressed me with her frank look at small-time life called "Merry-Go Round," in which she remarked on people who stay in their hometowns just to get pregnant, get married, get high, and get nowhere but where they have always been.

THIS piece of artistry stood out to me because Kacey straight-out (all right, kind of subtly), embraces homosexuality in a nonchalant manner as she tells her listeners that they should feel free to just do what the hell they want in the rest of life. And again, she remarks on society. If you eat too much, you're fat. If you don't eat enough, you're on crack. "You're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't, so you might as well just do whatever you want," she sings. Get married, don't get married, have lots of sex, smoke a joint, just stay at home all day. Kacey's cool with it.

"I Don't Know How," Best Coast

For those unfamiliar with this duo, they have a lovely surf-rock feel that was most prominent on their debut album "Crazy for You," which was very lo-fi and processed to alter Bethany Cosentino's vocals and add tons of reverb to Bobb Bruno's guitar and bass. Their sophomore effort "The Only Place" sounded a bit more mainstream while remaining in the beachy stoner genre.

The EP "Fade Away" is where you'll find this song, and I think it's got all of what makes Best Coast unique. Bethany's simple, yet powerful lyrics about love and heartbreak (and a hell of a lot of long notes) mixed with Bobb's mastery of the strings. Plus, the music video is as cheerful as ever. These guys know how to have fun, even when their hearts are breaking.

"Same Love," Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, feat. Mary Lambert

I know that this was released last year, but it really only got major radio play in 2013. What can I say about it that already hasn't been said? I really can't recall may songs that have been solely about homosexuality on Top 40 radio. I think it's a wonderful start to a major social change.

"Black Skinhead," Kanye West

One of these days, Ye will give himself a heart attack performing this song because it is so frantic and the lyrics are spat with such ferocious velocity. The song may not be complete without the video above--so, check it out and then go look at his performance on SNL. He touches on racism and slavery, and seems to be painting himself as a warrior against such evils. Call him what you will, but this man knows how to push the meaningful buttons when he wants to.

Also considered:

"Boss-Ass Bitch," Nicki Minaj

"Beat This Summer," Brad Paisley

"New Slaves," Kanye West

"All Kinds of Kinds," Miranda Lambert

Y'all need to stop: an overanalysis of the overanalysis of pop culture

This post references sexual abuse, racism, homo- and transphobia and general intolerance of other people. 

Over the past month or so, I have been inundated with pop culture analysis. 

Miley Cyrus is a terrible influence. 

Miley Cyrus is a strong feminist. 

Miley Cyrus is just bein' Miley. 

Robin Thicke is a rapist. 

Robin Thicke is satirizing machismo. 

Robin Thicke is celebrating sexuality. 

All pop music is crap anyway. 

And on, and on.

Everybody has those days

We live in an age where everyone has the platform to widely distribute their thoughts and opinions and use other people's thoughts and opinions to back their own up. And here I am taking advantage of it. Ain't that America? 

We, the people of the Internet, enjoy thoughtful and important diatribe. And we enjoy making everything we see and hear into a lesson. A lesson in sexism. Racism. Misogyny. Homophobia. Rape culture. Religious discrimination. Body image. 

For every person who types out a blog about "YAAAS LADY GAGA LOOKS SO GOOD SHE IS AN INSPIRATION" there is someone calling Lady Gaga a terrible influence, an over-sexualized burlesque dancer. And then someone else is scoffing at both opinions and saying Gaga is satirizing the pop culture industry. And then someone else is pooh-poohing all three opinions and saying Gaga is stealing ideas and inspiration from Madonna. 

Maybe I'm just spending too much time on Tumblr, where people believe Tubby Custard is chicken nuggets, breeders should die, and you can't say a damn thing without someone crying foul play. 

Here is what I want to ask.

Is our culture of Internet analysis making us better or worse?

Are we making valid analysis and increasing awareness of important issues? Or are we just creating a world where everything and everyone fight against us? Where we just assume the worst and take a cynical attitude towards our fellow men and women (and everyone in between)?

There must be a point where we are just fear-mongering. A point where we are bringing too much to the table and looking too deeply into the issue. And it's bound to drive us insane one day.

Tyra says ENOUGH

Perhaps it may drive the ones we are trying to represent or the people we are worried about to a higher level of nervous awareness. 

There are probably people out there, victims of sexual abuse, who heard "Blurred Lines" and didn't think twice. Or who never even gave it a listen. But because of the blogosphere hype, they are suddenly forced to think about every line. Every lyric. And be told how it could relate to them. And then they do remember. 

If a celebrity woman thinks she should start eating healthier, some people will say she should because she needs to lose weight. Some will say she should defy traditional beauty standards and embrace her curves and be a good role model for little girls. Some will say she is being a bad feminist by conforming to our male-dominated society. And at the end of the day, maybe all she wants to do is train for a 5K--but there are five different theories about her eating habits, and she's starting to get paranoid. We could say the same for any person who wants to make a change.

Here's another example...Let's say I, a white Ohioan, put a picture of me and two of my friends on this blog. And let's say one is white, and one is black. What would people say if, in the picture, I only had my arm around the white friend? I've spent enough time online to know that someone, somewhere would say I really hate black people deep down in my heart. But if I had my arm around my black friend in this photo, or even around both friends, they might say I'm trying too hard to appear like I'm NOT racist and I think in cool because I have a black friend. (The obvious solution here is for us all to do duck face and be holding our drinks, right?)

So maybe my black friend would see those comments, and she never would have even thought of me as racist, or of herself as an "outcast" in the trio, until people brought it up. And then what would she think? That I'm trying to use her for some fake show of solidarity? That people think she's trying to be "too white?" Would she then confront me about my supposed racism?

Granted, these are all hypotheticals. But I do think that we're making ourselves more anxious than we need to be about what's out there. 

It's like we are using the Internet as WebMD for our pop culture "symptoms." Some want to find an explanation, and some want to write a diagnosis. Either way, something's wrong or something is racially, culturally, socially important because WE decide it is. And it's good to have that discussion. But it can also just go way too far. Do we really need to second- and third-guess everything we think, do, and say? Everything we see, hear, read?

I don't mean to discredit anyone's experiences or tell people that their opinions don't matter. Perhaps I am not the best person to be writing this--as a white cis woman, average weight, taller than most, raised in Ohio, never been a victim of abuse or had anything glaringly sexist said to me. I'm gay but most people can't tell, so I haven't faced much discrimination. And you can't tell by looking at me that I have some anxiety problems. So by society's standards, I'm "normal." I'm privileged. I don't really have the right to tell people to take a breather. 

So, discredit this if you think I'm an idiot, a hypocrite, etc. I'm part of the problem, because I'm clearly analyzing this all past the point of logical conclusions. And I'm not offering a solution, explanation, etc. I just want to say that I think we're making ourselves sick with worry.

We talk too much. We think too much. Sometimes, we need to just take the world as it comes.

Britney Spears IS America: The Femme Fatale and the land of the free

Original published 7 April 2011

Updated 2 December 2012

With the release of her seventh album, “Femme Fatale,” in 2011 and her successful stint as an “X Factor” judge, Britney Spears has once again proven her worth to any dissenters. Many wrote the pop princess off as another failed teen star, as her personal struggles from 2004-2007 made her the subject of tabloid news. But Britney’s journey -- no matter how many children, shaved heads and marriages it has taken – has picked back up again (for the record, I think that count is 2-1-2, with a third marriage planned).

She celebrated her 31^st birthday today, and I honestly think she’s just going to keep getting stronger and stronger. And Britney’s triumphs and failures parallel that of another young superstar -- the United States. Yes, the land of the free itself: once a young upstart, now the most powerful country in the world. The past 13 years have been instrumental for Spears and for the US, and it’s a bit strange how closely the two stories are connected.

The 90s were when Brit-Brit burst into the scene. “...Baby One More Time” was released in 1999. It was a sexual album, something unique. And the American people love getting sexual...after all, it was in 1998 when Bill Clinton was charged with the Lewinsky scandal. 2000 brought some more controversy. Bush v. Gore, of course, and the question of how the Florida voting system got so badly screwed up. But also that sneaky Britney wearing lewd clothing, grinding around and corrupting the minds of our young children. For shame!

Of course, 2004 was when all the shit hit the fan. The American people started to think the war in Iraq was an unnecessary campaign started by a war-hungry president. Popular sentiment about the war and the government began to take a turn for the worse. And in Britney’s world, things weren’t going well. 2004 was the year she married her childhood friend Jason Alexander in Las Vegas, annulled the marriage 55 hours later and got engaged to Kevin Federline three months after that. Yikes.

Those following years weren’t very good, either.  Katrina hit the Gulf Coast in 2005. The economy went into a decline as the housing bubble collapsed, and the Great Recession began in 2007. Britney had kids, checked into rehab and shaved her head. In this time of tumult, economic uncertainty and attacks on the paparazzi, how would America and its pop princess pull themselves out of a deep rut? Change was needed.

And change came.

Barack Obama won the 2008 election on a campaign of hope and, yes, change. He seemed like just the right person to steer America out of the recession and get troops home

.

Also in 2008, Britney Spears released “Circus,” one of the fastest-selling albums that year, to much critical acclaim. It seemed as if everything on both sides of the spectrum would be all right. The next few years were indeed a circus for all parties involved. A media circus took place around the Obama family and everything they did, from Barack’s controversial healthcare bill to what school Sasha and Malia picked to Michelle’s clothes and right down to what they would name that cute little dog.

Britney’s circus was on her 2009 “Circus Starring Britney Spears” tour. With a gross of U.S. $131.8 million, it became the fifth highest-grossing tour of the year. She was also a part of the hit television show “Glee.” An entire episode was focused on her music and her influences in the American pop scene (they attributed another one to her in 2012).

Through 2010 and 2011, the circus was still in full swing, but it shifted a bit. Obama wasn’t the most popular guy on campus anymore, and new Republican senators and congressmen began to make some changes of their own. The media is still as aggressive as ever.

And Britney? She released “Femme Fatale,” an album with a different sound than her past projects. “Hold it Against Me” gave Spears her fourth number-one single on the chart, and made her only the second artist in history to have two consecutive singles debut at number one (Mariah Carey was the first).

 

There were also plenty of changes this year. Brit has been in the spotlight most recently for her work on “X Factor” with Simon Cowell, Demi Lovato and LA Reid. And she is very happily engaged to her former manager, Jason Trawick, whom she seems to have a very happy and healthy relationship with.

The US, of course, wrapped up a presidential election – no matter who wins the presidency, there are always some big changes nationwide. But we decided to continue our own relationship with Barack Obama – that, or he is our own personal “X Factor” winner. You can pick how you want the extended metaphor to go for that one.

There are a lot of things in the works for B. Spears. She still has some trouble shaking off her past, of course. Critics won’t let her forget those marriages or her paparazzi attack, and there are a few lingering court cases or custody battles that we seem to hear about every now and then. But she seems to be on the up-and-up lately and getting her career back in the swing of things.

A lot is in store for the US, too, as we head into Obama’s second term. The economy is still struggling a bit, and the government has a lot on its big ol’ plate. But jobs are returning, slowly but surely, and I think there is still some hope for this country to get back on its feet.

It sure has been a wild time for Britney, and for the country she calls home. And to be honest, who really knows what the next few years will bring? A new president? A new marriage? Some more racy clothes? We can only wonder. And, of course, we can only hope...hope that two of the biggest young celebrities in the world will keep entertaining us for years to come.