Let me tell you something about Taylor Swift.

I liked her music in high school. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... Whatever. So then when I was in college, she started putting out this music that was totally pop but ran on the country stations, and Taylor was like, weirdly okay with that.

Like, if she would destroy the industry singlehandedly, reviewers would be like, "Why didn't you just call yourself a pop star?" And she'd be like, "Why are you so obsessed with me?" So then, for the 2014 CMAs, which was an all-country music party, they were like, "Taylor, we can't nominate you for much, because we think you're a pop singer." I mean, they couldn't have a pop singer at their party. There were gonna be girls there in their cowboy boots. I mean, right? She was a POP SINGER.

So then her mom called Miranda Lambert's mom and started yelling at her, it was so ridiculous. And then she dropped out of country music because no one would talk to her, and she came back in the fall for pop music, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack.

(inspired by Mean Girls and someone asking me about my Taylor hate).