My friends, I am the victim of false advertising. Whoever sold me that seedless watermelon at the farmer's market was a dirty rotten liar. Obviously he was blindly guessing as to the contents of that melon. How did he know what was gonna be in there?
Finding seeds in seedless watermelon is like finding high-fructose corn syrup in Diet Coke or finding a child in your belly a few months after your boyfriend says he has protection. An unwanted surprise. A lie. And when I buy a watermelon, market man, I want a sweet tasty treat that sends rivulets of pink juice down my mouth and NOT a mine field where hard black pustules burst out of the ground and attack me. Besides, those seeds are how plants have sex and I do NOT want little melons growing in my belly.
So for future reference...please. Advertise exactly what you are giving to me.
And PS, Axe. Women do not flock to me when I use your shampoo. I am sorely disappointed.
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